2017 Arizona "Training Camp"

After race season last year, Anthony and I both had a fire in our bellies. We talked about the next few years and our goals and we decided we were ready to be "all in."  This meant that we had a lot of things to evaluate starting with coaches, how many races, which races, long term goals, and short term goals.  And we have to respect and support each others schedules, goals, and progress understanding that we each have a different journey.  Lastly, we had to accept that being "all in" is darn expensive. 

We both started building our foundation for 2017 on November 1.  We've both been extremely consistent and we've been having so much fun individually and watching each other grow both mentally and physically.  It's not been easy trying to find the balance that is needed to be all in while respecting each others different schedules, but we seem to have found a pretty good balance.  

With the consistency and dedication, my confidence has grown, my relationship with my coaches has grown, and as I prepare to start my first ever training camp, I feel healthy,  excited, and ready to overload my body with lots of swim/bike/run fun in warm and beautiful Arizona! 

After about 7 hours of work on Friday, we drove about 5 hours to start our trip with a stop over in Santa Fe, NM.  Santa Fe was never a place on my radar, but what a cool city.  We are looking forward to stopping over on our drive home.  We had just enough time there to take Brutus on a short morning jog to get the driving out of our legs from the day before and get some authentic New Mexican breakfast (burrito for Anthony, Huevos rancheros for me).  

Brutus was such a good road trip buddy for both legs of the trip.  After our morning run and breakfast in Santa Fe, we showered and headed off to finish the drive - about 7 more hours to Tucson.  We stopped at the Whole Foods in Albuquerque for some good driving snacks and lunch for later.  The drive from Santa Fe to Tucson is nothing to write home about, but it was seamless and went by fast with some chatting, some podcasts, and some tunes.

For our stay in Tucson, after much research on options for places to stay, we opted for an airbnb.  The only questionable part was the owner was going to be home - he just opens his house to guests.  After talking to him, he was ok with Brutus, ok with us taking over the kitchen, and extremely laid back and kind, so we felt very comfortable.  When we arrived, Charlie was doing yard work and welcomed us and made us feel like we were right at home - like family.  I am really happy with our homestay so far!

After getting everything moved in (we had to bring a lot of stuff!), Anthony hung out with Brutus (who LOVES his backyard for the week) and Charlie and I headed to the grocery store to get all of our fuel for the week (A LOT!).  Now just time to have some dinner and relax before the work starts! 

Nothing happens unless first we dream.

It has been a long time since I have posted on here...I couldn't even remember my password!  I'm back, at least for today.  :)  I recently saw this 5 minute video.  It was relatable to all athletes, but it was specific to gymnastics - the sport that started it all for me.  Gymnastics taught me discipline, passion, and the power of dreaming and working towards those dreams.  Gymnastics taught me to control my emotions and to not let fear win.  This video hit home, I watched it a second and a third time so that I could write down the words.... and I just have to share:

“Believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow your heart, even when it leads you off the well worn path.  And that will make all the difference.

Your time is limited so don’t waste it living someone elses life. Don’t be trapped by dogma.  Don’t let the noise of others opinions drown out your own inner voice.. You’ve got to find what you love. 

The only way to do great work is to love what you do.  If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking and don’t settle.  Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition.  They somehow already know what you truly want to become.

But you’re gonna have some ups and youre gonna have some downs.  Most people give up on themselves easily, you know the human spirit is powerful?  There’s nothing as powerful, it’s hard to kill the human spirit.  Anybody can feel good when they have their health, their bills are paid they have happy relationships.  Anybody can be positive then, anybody can have a larger vision then, anybody can have faith under those kinds of circumstances. 

The real challenge of growth – mentally, emotionally, and spiritually comes when you get knocked down.  It takes courage to act.  Part of being hungry when you’ve been defeated - it takes courage to start over again. 

Fear kills dreams.  Fear kills hope.  Fear puts people in the hospital.  Fear can age you.  It can hold you back from doing something that you know within yourself that you are capable of doing.  But it will paralyze you. 

At end of your feelings is nothing.  But at the end of every principle is a promise.  Behind your little feelings – there might not be absolutely nothing behind your little feelings,  but behind every principle is a promise.  And some of you in your life – the reason you’re not at your goal right now- because you’re just all about your feelings. 

You don’t feel like waking up – who does? Every day you say no to your dreams you may be pushing your dreams back a whole six months, a whole year.  That one single day.  That one day you didn’t get up could have pushed your stuff back I don’t know how long. 

Don’t allow your emotions to control you.  We are emotional, but you want to begin to discipline your emotions.  If you don’t discipline and contain your emotions, they will use you.  You want it.  And you’re going to go all out to have it.  It’s not going to be easy. But if you’re serious, you’ll go all out.  I’m in control here.  I’m not gonna let this get me down, I’m not gonna let this destroy me.  I’m coming back and I’ll be stronger and better because of it. 

You have got to make a declaration.  That this is what you stand for.  You’re standing up for your dreams, you’re standing up for peace of mind, you’re standing up for health.  Take full responsibility for your life.  Accept where you are.  And the responsibility that you are going to take yourself where you want to go. 

You can decide that "I’m going to live each day as if it were my last."  Live your life with passion.  With some pride.  Decide that you are going to push yourself.  The last chapter of your life has not been written yet.  It doesn’t matter what happened yesterday.  It doesn’t matter what happens to you….what matters is, what are you gonna do about it?

This year I will make this goal become a reality.  I won’t talk  about it any more.  I can. I can. I can."

If you know me well, you know that something happened when I crossed that finish line at Ironman Boulder this year.  I let myself down, but a fire ignited in me the second I finished that race.  This video hit home.  No more talking about it, I am ready to put in the work, be patient, and make the sacrifices.  I CAN. 

It's a good day to go chase your dreams!  Happy Friday! :) 

If your dreams don’t scare you, they aren’t big enough.

After finishing Ironman Lake Placid in July last year, my focus should have shifted to healing my hip/glute so that I could have a strong 2015 triathlon season, but instead I got scared away from what would happen if I wasn’t able to get better and couldn’t ride long distance anymore as that’s what seemed to be the root of my problems.  I was really confused about what my dreams were, what my plan of action was going to be for my hip, and I just couldn’t find focus.  What I did know was that I was 90% sure I could train for a marathon with minimal hip/glute issues (at least minimal compared to long distance tri training).  So, I thought why not chase that Boston dream?! 

The problem:  I turned Boston into my “dream” even though it wasn’t necessarily something that lit me up.  This is not to say that Boston is not a goal of mine, but is it something that gives me butterflies thinking about it? No.  Is it a goal that scares me? No.  I have very little doubt in my ability to qualify for Boston (heck, I already have a BQ…it was just 13 seconds off from getting me to the start line).  This is not me being cocky or overly confident – I know my body and I know my abilities and I understand that a BQ is a big deal that many people spend years chasing.  I am not taking anything away from the accomplishment, I just don’t doubt my ability to accomplish it, if trained properly.

The thing is, I need to be chasing goals that light me up.  Goals that scare the crap out of me.  Goals that motivate me to jump out of bed in the morning.  I also need to be passionate about my training or it will fail.  Training for the Cleveland marathon proved to me that if I am not 100% passionate about what I am training for then it just isn’t going to go as planned, or perhaps it will, but I will be a miserable human being. 

The solution: Simple – I am a triathlete, not a runner.  It took me training for another marathon to realize that while I do really enjoy running, running alone is not my passion.  I love to be in the saddle.  I wake up with so much excitement when I go to bed knowing that a long ride is on my schedule the next morning.  I love how much I have to overcome swimming.  I love running off the bike.  I am a triathlete.  I am competitive.  As a competitive triathlete that loves to go the distance… that really scary dream is Kona.  I have no idea if this goal is feasible.  It scares me so much, but such a big dream puts me in a place where I can find that focus and really enjoy the journey and take each workout for what it is.

My year “off” was so necessary.  A few weeks ago, I had a run that involved LONG, STRONG/FAST HILL REPEATS.  I was not as strong as I hoped I would be.  I struggled and almost threw up after each hill.  It was supposed to hurt and it was supposed to be hard, but I should have felt stronger.  A year ago, I would have been discouraged and gotten down on myself.  This year, I thought “Wow, I am already racing pretty strong and feeling good so just imagine how I will be racing if I keep working hard and start to feel stronger during and after workouts like this one!  I have so much room to grow and my big dreams of the big Island might not be so silly if I keep putting in the work!”

I have always been a pretty positive person, but in the past I can guarantee I would have come home from that workout down on myself.  But this time around, I came home excited to see that opportunity for growth.  That’s what it means to enjoy the journey.  I was in the moment in that workout.  I was 100% focused on finishing as strong as I could and I wasn’t judging myself or getting down on myself for not being as strong or fast as I would have liked.

This year taught me how to be in the moment, how to be smart and respect my body.  In 2014, training for Lake Placid I learned how to respect my body when it really needed an extra day off.  As athletes, we often push through workouts simply because they are on the schedule – even when our bodies are telling us that we need to dial back the intensity for the day or take the day off.  I learned to listen and respect my body.  One of my number one rules is that if I am feeling extra tired or off on a particular day – start the warmup.  If after a good warmup my body is still telling me “NO” then I dial it back/modify the workout or call it a day depending on what exactly I am feeling.  Usually, I am ready to crush my workout after a good warmup, but on occasion, my body just simply needs an extra recovery day, and that’s OK!  That was such a big lesson.

This year as I have been working to become a more competitive triathlete I have learned to respect my body in another way: trust it and believe in it, even when it tells me it’s “done.”  I know I have a lot in me, but it is HARD WORK to get faster and stronger and it is SO MENTAL  I have to trust my body and mind and know that I am able to push through some serious discomfort, especially on race day. I have really been learning how to become a strong athlete MENTALLY and not limit myself because it’s hard, uncomfortable, and quite frankly – painful.

In my 2015 training and racing season, I have learned so much and really kind of found myself as an athlete.  I have big, scary dreams that I am truly passionate about and I am so excited for the journey ahead as I chase my big dreams and continue learning how to be the best, smartest, happiest athlete I can be.  One more race, next weekend(Nation’s Triathlon), followed by a nice rejuvenating unstructured off season, and then it’s time to get stronger and faster and smarter for 2016.  I am looking forward to racing Chattanooga 70.3 with Anthony and I could not be more excited to race in beautiful Mont Tremblant for my second 140.6! (And I think it's a really good sign that I get butterflies in my belly when I think about my next Ironman race!) 

If you're still reading, a quick side thought on this blog.  I go in and out of blogging..I go out of it at times because I feel a bit self centered just writing about my life and training for others to read.  Sometimes it bothers me - I have the same qualms with social media. But I go in for a few more reasons.  I hope that some can read this and find inspiration, motivation, strength, and some sort of connection.  I think having passions and hobbies makes life livable.  I work really hard at work, but being able to afford my pass times is what makes me really appreciate work and want to work harder.  I am a huge advocate of having a work-life balance and putting family, health, and LIFE first.  Of course there is a time and a place to put work on a pedestal, but I just find that far too many people aren't truly LIVING.  I hope that this can motivate people to find that balance. Find that health and happiness while still working hard to make a living.  Everyone's life and journey is different.  Not everyone can make the time to train for an Ironman (ok, most just don't want to and that's fair), but I truly believe everyone should be able to make time to find health and happiness.  

Lastly, this blog helps me so much.  Writing down the thoughts that shape my life is really helpful in finding focus for me.  It's so easy for me to question why I do what I do, but when I think about it and put write it down, I realize that I am passionate about it and I have one life...why wouldn't I do what I am truly passionate about?  It may be selfish, but if I didn't have my passions to follow, I wouldn't ever be truly present, I wouldn't be full of the life that I am.  I believe that being more physically present but without that light and fullness is far more selfish than being physically less present, but full of life when I am around others.  And so... that is why I choose to live this triathlife and it is just icing on the cake that my husband and I can share this passion.